Don't you just love those kinds of e-mail that make you wish that you had
never opened it? Most of the time I get frustrated when I get e-mails that
are just a forward of another e-mail or the other person doesn't really
participate in the communication. We end up swapping 3 or 4 more e-mails
just to get things resolved. I mean, if it were a face to face
conversation, they wouldn't just give you a half answer and then walk away like
the conversation was over..would they? How about e-mails where the
person always requests a read receipt. Come on, if it is
that important call me on the phone. I normally don't send the receipt
unless I think it is important that they know I read their message. I
still like to be courteous.
My point? Open
Loops has two posts on "How to Lose Friends and Alienate People With
Email". Part
1 discusses the bad e-mails we get and deal with while part
2 gives suggestions on how to retaliate. ;-) Both are good reads
and quite humorous too. Below are a few that I liked and can relate
too.
The Bad
- Have a long signature line – The longer the better. Ten to
fifteen lines would be right in this case. Use it to publicize your
uncle's life insurance agency or to tell every one about your grandmother’s
real estate company. Think of it as a billboard. You might even be
able to sell advertising space in your email signature if you send
enough.
- Don’t tell the recipient why you’re sending the attachments – This is
even sweeter when the attachments have strange names that give no clue as to
what they are. Big fun!
- Write your email to one person and send it to someone else – This
works great when you are talking about the person you sent it to. You
write to Tim about what a [explicit removed] John is. Then, send it to
John.
Getting Back
- Use the “Reply to all” button — Use this if the email is sent to a lot
of people and the subject is sensitive or confidential. If the sender is
doing some damage control on a mistake, capitalize on this now while everyone
can know it.
- Misspell their name – No other word, in any language, is more
important than one’s own name. Use it and misspell it often.
- Ignore the topic when you reply — When you finally get around to
replying to the person’s email, ignore the topic of the original email.
Even better, just send the reply but don’t write anything. Later, send
an email back why the person hasn’t replied to you. For more fun,
mention the deadline they “missed”.
I hope you went and read the posts. You'll see a lot there that I'm
sure you've rolled your eyes at when you see them in your
inbox.